kim's passing has prompted me to do something i've meant to do for some time in finally posting the music i put together for nick's memorial service this past december. i must say it was cathartic having the task of gathering the music for the memorial service and reception. i found several web pages to be helpful in this task, but by far the best resource was http://www.thebestsongs.net/funeral_songs.html if anyone has this task.
go rest high on that mountain by vince gill was played during the memorial and the first song of the reception
the rest are in the order i placed the songs on the cds to play during the reception
celtic bagpipe instrumental version of amazing grace
tears in heaven-eric clapton
angels among us-alabama
bye bye-mariah carey
when i get where i'm going-brad paisley feat dolly parton
one more day with you-diamond rio
wind beneath my wings-bette middler
ships of heaven-blackhawk
good riddance-green day
one sweet day-mariah carey and boyz ii men
i believe-diamond rio
candle in the wind-elton john
who you'd be today-kenny chesney
free bird-lynard skynard
if heaven was needing a hero-jo dee messina
shine your light-robbie robertson
the dance-garth brooks
godspeed-dixie chicks
i will remember you-sarah mclachlan
i'll remember-madonna
it's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday-boyz ii men
wish you were here-pink floyd
can't cry hard enough-the williams brothers
oh very young-cat stevens
gone too soon-michael jackson
wish you were here-mark wills
if i had only known-reba mcentire
hallelujiah-jeff buckley
amazing grace-patsy cline
hurt-johnny cash
angel-sarah mclachlan
you raised me up-josh groban
i'll fly away-allison krauss
here without you-3 doors down
amazing grace-dixie chicks
Saturday, February 7, 2009
loss of a friend
i found out this morning while at work that a former coworker,kim had committed suicide by overdosing on her psychotropic medications. as on of her medications was seroquel, i have a feeling that was the culprit. sadly, my dear friend charles attempted suicide by overdosing on seroquel and almost lost his life. almost a year later, he was successfully committed suicide by shooting himself in the head. i myself have had a suicide attempt with seroquel and did not take enough before being found. i learned through charles' attempt about using seroquel for this purpose. til then, i just thought of it as a medication i used to help as a nonaddictive sleep aid and an antipsychotic. so sad that medication meant to help with mental illness making it readily available to those who suffer from bipolar disorder can be used in the depths of their depression to end their life. of course, we are a resourceful lot.
i am saddened that she is gone from us. i really felt a connection to her as someone who suffered from bipolar disorder and could understand some of our similar experiences both in life and with the disease. i am also sad that since she left our work for a new job that i hadn't made more of an effort to keep in touch. i loved her lack of fear at speaking her mind. i really respected her for that.
one of the biggest shockers for today was my lack of shock with suicide. i now have lost a few friends to suicide and have had even more attempt it and survive. while others struggled with the understanding of why she did it and how she could do it, i felt like i was acting like the ambassador for mental illness. i tried to tell people she just could no longer handle the pain, and that she never meant to cause those she loved pain. doesn't make it hurt any less but i know it is true. years of battling with suicidal thoughts means i know where she was in her headspace. not being able to she beyond that pain. i must say it was an awkward mothering role to be in. it also taught me a bit about myself as i spent time fluttering over my friends and waiting to break down til i left work and called my best friend. i had to thank her for forcing me to go to the crazy house as i call it. brenda really has been a savior to me. i needed her voice.
resources on suicide many of which have both info on prevention and for family and friends who survive after a loved one commits suicide.
http://www.suicide.org/
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
http://www.save.org/
http://www.medicinenet.com/suicide/article.htm
http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/center_index.php?id=9
i am saddened that she is gone from us. i really felt a connection to her as someone who suffered from bipolar disorder and could understand some of our similar experiences both in life and with the disease. i am also sad that since she left our work for a new job that i hadn't made more of an effort to keep in touch. i loved her lack of fear at speaking her mind. i really respected her for that.
one of the biggest shockers for today was my lack of shock with suicide. i now have lost a few friends to suicide and have had even more attempt it and survive. while others struggled with the understanding of why she did it and how she could do it, i felt like i was acting like the ambassador for mental illness. i tried to tell people she just could no longer handle the pain, and that she never meant to cause those she loved pain. doesn't make it hurt any less but i know it is true. years of battling with suicidal thoughts means i know where she was in her headspace. not being able to she beyond that pain. i must say it was an awkward mothering role to be in. it also taught me a bit about myself as i spent time fluttering over my friends and waiting to break down til i left work and called my best friend. i had to thank her for forcing me to go to the crazy house as i call it. brenda really has been a savior to me. i needed her voice.
resources on suicide many of which have both info on prevention and for family and friends who survive after a loved one commits suicide.
http://www.suicide.org/
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
http://www.save.org/
http://www.medicinenet.com/suicide/article.htm
http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/center_index.php?id=9
Friday, February 6, 2009
how did i miss the news domino mag is closing
i am filled with great sadness that one of my fave decorating magazines is closing. somehow i seem to be the last to know that domino magazine is closing. their webpage is still up for a few more weeks. i recommend checking it out especially the how to section while you still can. http://www.dominomag.com/
branching out
i am starting a new blog. i know i have only have only been blogging for a few weeks,but i want to do a blog on thriftyness whether it be diy ideas, shopping, freebies, recipes etc. i'm just beginning to set it up, but i will be sure to let y'all know when its up and running. hopefully, you can follow it.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
the miracle of the baby oil bath and its dangers
i know i can't stop talking about ways i've been dealing with my dry skin, but its really an issue for me this winter. since i was lucky enough to get my father's skin, i've been dealing with this issue for years. i know the order of strength of moisturizer from lotion to cream to body butter to oil. in fact, i have a saying i tell my dad all the time with his hands and feet. i tell him cream not lotion. he even repeats it back to me. its actually kind of cute but just to us. well, this is beyond a cream solution. i for some reason fall prey to pretty packaging and have been known to buy bath oils. to save money, i thought i would go old school and use baby oil. i started up by oiling up after the bath. this still wasn't helping in hard to reach places namely my back. so, i decided to start adding a capful to my bath at night after i had already washed my hair. works like a miracle. and, i must admit i still love the fragrance. problem is you really need to be careful or you'll end up like me with a some embarrassing bruises. the tub got slick thanks to the oil, and i had a nasty fall.
decrystallizing honey
so, its cold and flu season. i have been lucky enough not to have a major bout yet. but, i am getting a bit of scratchy throat probably from yelling too much. so, i thought i would bite the bullet and have some hot tea with honey. i can only stand honey not sugar with hot tea. problem is that honey is rarely used in my house. so, my honey had crystallized. i couldn't remember initially how to fix it and was going to throw the bottle away. a bit later, i remember having heard to fix this problem by placing the bottle in boiling water to warm it. the problem with that is that i have a plastic bottle. so, i tried microwaving 30 seconds at a time. crystals gone. i read online and found almost exactly the same solutions.
how did i never know about the wonders of cocoa butter
the other night while in walmart i became victim to the impulse buying in the checkout aisle. they had cocoa butter balm in stick form. at least, it was only $1. apparently everyone but me knows the wonders of cocoa butter. i've had pregnant friends use it for stretch marks but that was my only knowledge about it. i must say unlike a lot of other moisturizers there is no greasy residue and it smells like chocolate. i am hooked.
our fritos tradition and how to make fritos at home
tuesday night is my night out with my friends. two of my friends and i always go to eat afterwards. usually, we hit up sheetz. but, the first tuesday of the month, we've started going to walmart. we each get a lunchables, and we share fritos with french onion dip. i had never tried fritos with french onion dip. actually, as a child, we didn't really do dips except chips and salsa. but, as an adult, i've always eaten fritos plain or with chili, salsa, or refried beans. i have to admit i thought it would be weird with french onion dip. honestly, its really good. i took home the extra fritos home with me. no dip left though. i mistakenly picked up french onion cheese dip. it tasted like nacho cheese minus any spice. afterwards, i wondered if there is any way to make fritos at home and look what i found http://www.care2.com/greenliving/homemade-fritos.html. one way to save money when you want a snack or are having a party. added benefit you can control how much salt is in them if this is a concern for you and baking them makes them healthier.
today's free stuff 2/5/09
free valentine's day photo postcards mailed up to 2 a day through 2/9/09 for facebook members http://www.info-hippopost.com/20090204_hp.asp
free coupon printout for a free tire guage from buell http://www.buell.com/en_us/get-yours/special-offers/tire-gauge/coupon.asp for locations http://www.buell.com/en_us/
free subscription to elle decor http://www.mercurymagazines.com/pr1/101/101206
free hypoallergenic pillowcase from xyzal Call 1-888-669-9992 -press 1, then 1 again -its automated
free coupon printout for a free tire guage from buell http://www.buell.com/en_us/get-yours/special-offers/tire-gauge/coupon.asp for locations http://www.buell.com/en_us/
free subscription to elle decor http://www.mercurymagazines.com/pr1/101/101206
free hypoallergenic pillowcase from xyzal Call 1-888-669-9992 -press 1, then 1 again -its automated
smoking ban my pass in virginia home of big tobacco of all places
i must say i was truly surprised to hear that a smoking ban in restaurants made it out of subcomittee here in viriginia. regardless of whether i smoke or not, virginia is still home of big tobacco having the largest manufacturing plant of tobacco remaining in the united states still in the capital, richmond. tobacco lobby has always been a powerful lobby in this state and usually been able to quash any smoking bans. tobacco is still a huge part of our economy. 2008 was the first year since the 1600s that another product surprisingly tomatoes was a larger export from virginia than tobacco. even more shocking to me is that only 23 other states have bans on smoking in restaurants and bars. while smoking ban bills have come through the state legislature before, none have made it out of senate subcomittee. this bill with bipartisan support of the democrat governor tim kaine and republicans including speaker of the house bill howell seems likely to pass. i never thought i would see this day.
for more info check out http://www.wtopnews.com/?nid=25&sid=1594013
for more info check out http://www.wtopnews.com/?nid=25&sid=1594013
update on my wrinkle reducer post
to use the homemade wrinkle reducer i posted previously http://rebos2003.blogspot.com/2009/01/wow-way-to-deal-with-wrinkles-on-cheap.html, i've discovered you only need one or two pieces of pineapple rind. being a penny pincher, i've been trying to figure out a way to make the leftover pineapple rind last. obviously, it has a limited shelf life in the fridge. unbeknownst to me, you can freeze pineapple. just be sure to plan ahead and move the portion needed to the fridge to thaw several hours earlier like in the morning if you do it at night.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
things to remember as a customer in a restaurant
as i was blogging about the denny's effect on my restaurant and the nightmare it caused, i thought i needed to come up with a list of things from a servers point of view customers need to remember when eating out.
1. if you are in a bad mood when you enter the restaurant, please do not take it out on your server. depending on your server, a few things most likely will happen. generally, your server will try to avoid your table because who wants to be given a hard time.
2. if you feel your food is taking to long, its not your servers fault. your server is not your cook. he or she cannot do anything to get it cooked any faster. look around you, if the restaurant is full there is your explanation. if there has been inclimate weather, there is a good chance the staff of the restaurant may not all be there either. your food item may be in high demand at the moment ie we ran out of grits and more are cooking. remember if you wanted fast food, you wouldn't be at a sit down restaurant. good food often takes time. my all time favorite incident involving this happened when a customer got upset with me when we had received word less than 15 minutes ago that a coworker had passed away. i apologized and explained the situation that we had been surprised by this news and were in a bit of shock and doing our best to cope. she handled herself as a perfect customer and human being from then on out.
3. do not base how quickly your food should get to you by the tables around you. just because you arrived first does not always mean your food will arrive first. your food item may take more time to prepare ie your neighbor ordered a salad and you ordered a well done steak. in my restaurant the most common situation this happens is with a wait on grilled chicken. grilled chicken takes the longest to cook of any of our proteins. they may have ordered before you. most tables order drinks then need time to look over the menu before ordering, but sometimes customers especially regulars come in already knowing what their order will be and give it to the server as soon as they see the server. speaking of regulars, just like in bars some restaurants have regulars who get their food without even having to order because they get the same thing every time. i have several of these regulars who the cook sees them walking through the door, and the cook begins their meal.
4. if something is wrong with your food, do not blame your server. once again, your server didn't cook it. explain to your server the problem with the food, and he or she will get the cook to fix it. often when taking food to a table, a server has no idea until the customer tastes the food there is a problem. i have served more steaks than i care to remember and am clueless as to the difference from external appearance between a medium rare and a medium steak. tell me, and i will happily take it back to have it recooked. please do not get rude with your server, yell at your server, or take it out of your tip.
5.do not wait til after your meal to tell anyone a problem with your food. complaining after you've eaten does no good but to leave you miserable. many restaurants and restaurant managers aren't willing to do anything if you've already eaten the meal. however, if you make your server aware the server can have it recooked or get you a new item or possibly even taken off the check. but, still a tip for the full amount of the bill is expected.
6. tip and tip appropriately. tipping for servers is generally expected to be 18-20%. tipping beyond that for good service is appropriate. as a server, i generally tip more since i work in the industry and know what its like. verbal tipping meaning telling someone they did a good job then giving a crappy tip or no tip at all is considered just about the worst in the industry. if you are trying to save money or can't afford a tip, don't go out. servers end up paying in essence for you to eat.
many states require servers to be paid minimum wage. but, the federal government only requires servers to be paid $2.13 an hour. many states still go by this guideline, virginia being one. servers absolutely depend on tips as their main source of income. additionally, the federal government tax servers based on their tips. the government assumes that servers will receive at minimum 8 1/2 % of their sales in tips. whenever you tip less than this or stiff someone the server is still expected to claim they made this much and be taxed for this. some restaurants automatically claim for the servers a minimum of 15% regardless of what the server actually made. additionally, a server is required to make minimum wage once tips are added. so, if a server only makes $2.13 an hour the difference between that and minimum wage must at least be claimed. there are slow days or days when you get stiffed and this does not always happen especially as minimum wage increases and server wages do not.
additionally, many servers are required to tip out. meaning a server has to pay a percentage of their sales to hosts, busboys, bartenders, and food runners.
finally,good service and bad service can often be tied to your tipping habits. if you ever repeat your business at a bar or restaurant, there is a good chance all the employees not just the person who served you last will know how you tip and treat you accordingly. someone who tips well even if they require a bit more work will have all the servers falling all over one another to wait and you and will go out of their way to make sure everything is perfect. a bad tipper is often ignored by waitstaff for the same reason. servers are working to make money and if they know you are going to tip poorly why bother when they can turn their attention elsewhere.
7. if you come into a restaurant as part of a large party, tip more. large parties are more work. its easy to remember who ordered what at a table of 2 or 4, a table of 21(yes, i've handled tables of 21 and larger and delivered everyone's food from memory.) is a lot harder. carrying the food for a larger party is more work. it means more running to and from the table since peoples needs are less likely to be in tune as with a smaller party ie drink refills will be more staggered. often in handling a large party, the server will have to give up taking other parties or not be able to give their other parties proper attention. i have learned through the years larger parties rarely tip more than 10%. this is less than miss manners would recommend and i have always been puzzled by this. my only explanations are that it may seem like a lot of money to give one person or they assume gratuity is automatically included with larger parties. i have never worked at a restaurant that has included gratuity for large parties.
8. use your manners. say please and thank you. its always the right thing to do. don't talk with your mouthful to your server. do not bark orders at them. your server is your server not your servant. do not yell across the restaurant or snap your fingers at him or her. rudeness is never appreciated and often will lead to you being ignored or who knows what else where your food and drinks are being prepared. never ever cuss at your server. this will hopefully get you kicked out.
9. do not physically harrass your server. this may sound simple but apparently it is a difficult concept for many customers both male and female. verbally flirting while not always appreciated is par for the course and generally harmless as long as it does not get lurid. i still do not know what it means when a guy tells me i am prettier than a pair of new snow tires. i told everyone i worked with and we all got a good laugh out of it. squeezing my butt has far from the same reaction. i currently work in a family restaurant that serves breakfast and had this happen only a few weeks ago. there were children who saw this, and that disturbed me. but, beyond that i am not working for those kind of tips. a spilled drink in your lap or worse will often follow this behavior.
10.be careful with your kids, do not let them roam or put a child especially baby at the end of the table. many people will assume i am griping about how parents need to be better parents. not at all. this is a safety issue. servers carry some dangerous stuff often balanced somewhat precariously. i have had children run into me full force with no place thanks to tables being in the way for me to go to avoid it. luckily no one has ever been hurt from me, but i worry. at any given time, i have hot beverages and food that could easily burn me or the child or glass and ceramic that could break and seriously gash someone just to name a few. leaving children in the walkway by being at the end of the table or leaving a baby carrier at the end places them in the same sort of danger. who cares if you want the comfort of sitting in a booth. put the child's wellbeing first.
11. if you are going to sit at a table for a long time and by a long time i mean several hours especially when a restaurant is full, you should tip more. you are making more work for the server and should pay as such. additionally if the restaurant is busy or sometimes even if it isn't, you are taking a table away that could be turned and be another customer and money for the server.
12.people may not realize this but you should tip the person who prepares your carryout. at many restaurants, this person is a server who has to put together in addition to his or her other duties. tips are expected and appreciated.
13.please do not complain the restaurant is cold. there is a reason for this. the back of the restaurant is ridiculously hot. the servers are running and burning up. the restaurant employees appreciate when the restaurant is a bit cooler. you may only be there for an hour or so. the employees will be there for many hours. the last thing you want is a server perspiring into your food.
14. consider what time of day it is when you go to the restaurant. going at the very end of the day may mean your food quality is not the best. as a server, i am the exception when i say that i like customers til the last minute. more customers more money to be made. but, cooks, busers, and other employees are hourly and ready to go. they will not give it the same time and care to preparing your food.
15. you are usually not the only person a server is waiting on so be patient. the server is trying to get to everyone, but it may some time.
16. handing the server the tip is appreciated if tipping with cash. a lot of restaurants have problems with busboys or other servers stealing tips. its quite a common problem. even worse, as a customer, i have witnessed other customers stealing tips off tables. i once saw the son of a patron go back to the table and take the tip when he was supposed to be going to the bathroom.
17.do not mumble or speak softly when ordering. restaurants are often loud. when i ask you to repeat your order, it is because i couldn't hear you or you spoke to quickly. trust me i just want to get your order right. do not get offended.
18.bringing your own food or beverage into a restaurant is rude. many places have signs posted about bringing outside food or beverage. just don't do it.
19. show your appreciation via speaking to manager or comment card in addition to tipping. many restaurants take these into consideration.
20.if you have a special order, remember your server will hear it from the kitchen. know that the server is going out of his or her way to get your order the way you want it and should be rewarded.
21. do not make assumptions about your server's intelligence or lack thereof. i have a college degree as do many of my coworkers. many servers are in school or are artists or mothers or just prefer the flexible hours. treat your server with respect in general. i once had an older woman overhear my conversation about the trouble my boyfriend and i were having with our water heater. she then proceeded to tell me that god hates people like me who live in sin. consequently, no one wants to wait on her now.
22. horror stories with food do happen. i have never spit in or done anything else foul to anyone's food or beverage. have i heard stories which i know to be true. of course. violating any of the previous rules is always the reasons why. remember your server will be handling your food and drinks and be interacting with those who are preparing them. these are not the people you want to mistreat.
23. tip with cash if possible. in some restaurants, servers do not get credit card tips til they get their paychecks which may be weeks. servers look for immediate money and generally depend on it. this isn't a must but is appreciated.
1. if you are in a bad mood when you enter the restaurant, please do not take it out on your server. depending on your server, a few things most likely will happen. generally, your server will try to avoid your table because who wants to be given a hard time.
2. if you feel your food is taking to long, its not your servers fault. your server is not your cook. he or she cannot do anything to get it cooked any faster. look around you, if the restaurant is full there is your explanation. if there has been inclimate weather, there is a good chance the staff of the restaurant may not all be there either. your food item may be in high demand at the moment ie we ran out of grits and more are cooking. remember if you wanted fast food, you wouldn't be at a sit down restaurant. good food often takes time. my all time favorite incident involving this happened when a customer got upset with me when we had received word less than 15 minutes ago that a coworker had passed away. i apologized and explained the situation that we had been surprised by this news and were in a bit of shock and doing our best to cope. she handled herself as a perfect customer and human being from then on out.
3. do not base how quickly your food should get to you by the tables around you. just because you arrived first does not always mean your food will arrive first. your food item may take more time to prepare ie your neighbor ordered a salad and you ordered a well done steak. in my restaurant the most common situation this happens is with a wait on grilled chicken. grilled chicken takes the longest to cook of any of our proteins. they may have ordered before you. most tables order drinks then need time to look over the menu before ordering, but sometimes customers especially regulars come in already knowing what their order will be and give it to the server as soon as they see the server. speaking of regulars, just like in bars some restaurants have regulars who get their food without even having to order because they get the same thing every time. i have several of these regulars who the cook sees them walking through the door, and the cook begins their meal.
4. if something is wrong with your food, do not blame your server. once again, your server didn't cook it. explain to your server the problem with the food, and he or she will get the cook to fix it. often when taking food to a table, a server has no idea until the customer tastes the food there is a problem. i have served more steaks than i care to remember and am clueless as to the difference from external appearance between a medium rare and a medium steak. tell me, and i will happily take it back to have it recooked. please do not get rude with your server, yell at your server, or take it out of your tip.
5.do not wait til after your meal to tell anyone a problem with your food. complaining after you've eaten does no good but to leave you miserable. many restaurants and restaurant managers aren't willing to do anything if you've already eaten the meal. however, if you make your server aware the server can have it recooked or get you a new item or possibly even taken off the check. but, still a tip for the full amount of the bill is expected.
6. tip and tip appropriately. tipping for servers is generally expected to be 18-20%. tipping beyond that for good service is appropriate. as a server, i generally tip more since i work in the industry and know what its like. verbal tipping meaning telling someone they did a good job then giving a crappy tip or no tip at all is considered just about the worst in the industry. if you are trying to save money or can't afford a tip, don't go out. servers end up paying in essence for you to eat.
many states require servers to be paid minimum wage. but, the federal government only requires servers to be paid $2.13 an hour. many states still go by this guideline, virginia being one. servers absolutely depend on tips as their main source of income. additionally, the federal government tax servers based on their tips. the government assumes that servers will receive at minimum 8 1/2 % of their sales in tips. whenever you tip less than this or stiff someone the server is still expected to claim they made this much and be taxed for this. some restaurants automatically claim for the servers a minimum of 15% regardless of what the server actually made. additionally, a server is required to make minimum wage once tips are added. so, if a server only makes $2.13 an hour the difference between that and minimum wage must at least be claimed. there are slow days or days when you get stiffed and this does not always happen especially as minimum wage increases and server wages do not.
additionally, many servers are required to tip out. meaning a server has to pay a percentage of their sales to hosts, busboys, bartenders, and food runners.
finally,good service and bad service can often be tied to your tipping habits. if you ever repeat your business at a bar or restaurant, there is a good chance all the employees not just the person who served you last will know how you tip and treat you accordingly. someone who tips well even if they require a bit more work will have all the servers falling all over one another to wait and you and will go out of their way to make sure everything is perfect. a bad tipper is often ignored by waitstaff for the same reason. servers are working to make money and if they know you are going to tip poorly why bother when they can turn their attention elsewhere.
7. if you come into a restaurant as part of a large party, tip more. large parties are more work. its easy to remember who ordered what at a table of 2 or 4, a table of 21(yes, i've handled tables of 21 and larger and delivered everyone's food from memory.) is a lot harder. carrying the food for a larger party is more work. it means more running to and from the table since peoples needs are less likely to be in tune as with a smaller party ie drink refills will be more staggered. often in handling a large party, the server will have to give up taking other parties or not be able to give their other parties proper attention. i have learned through the years larger parties rarely tip more than 10%. this is less than miss manners would recommend and i have always been puzzled by this. my only explanations are that it may seem like a lot of money to give one person or they assume gratuity is automatically included with larger parties. i have never worked at a restaurant that has included gratuity for large parties.
8. use your manners. say please and thank you. its always the right thing to do. don't talk with your mouthful to your server. do not bark orders at them. your server is your server not your servant. do not yell across the restaurant or snap your fingers at him or her. rudeness is never appreciated and often will lead to you being ignored or who knows what else where your food and drinks are being prepared. never ever cuss at your server. this will hopefully get you kicked out.
9. do not physically harrass your server. this may sound simple but apparently it is a difficult concept for many customers both male and female. verbally flirting while not always appreciated is par for the course and generally harmless as long as it does not get lurid. i still do not know what it means when a guy tells me i am prettier than a pair of new snow tires. i told everyone i worked with and we all got a good laugh out of it. squeezing my butt has far from the same reaction. i currently work in a family restaurant that serves breakfast and had this happen only a few weeks ago. there were children who saw this, and that disturbed me. but, beyond that i am not working for those kind of tips. a spilled drink in your lap or worse will often follow this behavior.
10.be careful with your kids, do not let them roam or put a child especially baby at the end of the table. many people will assume i am griping about how parents need to be better parents. not at all. this is a safety issue. servers carry some dangerous stuff often balanced somewhat precariously. i have had children run into me full force with no place thanks to tables being in the way for me to go to avoid it. luckily no one has ever been hurt from me, but i worry. at any given time, i have hot beverages and food that could easily burn me or the child or glass and ceramic that could break and seriously gash someone just to name a few. leaving children in the walkway by being at the end of the table or leaving a baby carrier at the end places them in the same sort of danger. who cares if you want the comfort of sitting in a booth. put the child's wellbeing first.
11. if you are going to sit at a table for a long time and by a long time i mean several hours especially when a restaurant is full, you should tip more. you are making more work for the server and should pay as such. additionally if the restaurant is busy or sometimes even if it isn't, you are taking a table away that could be turned and be another customer and money for the server.
12.people may not realize this but you should tip the person who prepares your carryout. at many restaurants, this person is a server who has to put together in addition to his or her other duties. tips are expected and appreciated.
13.please do not complain the restaurant is cold. there is a reason for this. the back of the restaurant is ridiculously hot. the servers are running and burning up. the restaurant employees appreciate when the restaurant is a bit cooler. you may only be there for an hour or so. the employees will be there for many hours. the last thing you want is a server perspiring into your food.
14. consider what time of day it is when you go to the restaurant. going at the very end of the day may mean your food quality is not the best. as a server, i am the exception when i say that i like customers til the last minute. more customers more money to be made. but, cooks, busers, and other employees are hourly and ready to go. they will not give it the same time and care to preparing your food.
15. you are usually not the only person a server is waiting on so be patient. the server is trying to get to everyone, but it may some time.
16. handing the server the tip is appreciated if tipping with cash. a lot of restaurants have problems with busboys or other servers stealing tips. its quite a common problem. even worse, as a customer, i have witnessed other customers stealing tips off tables. i once saw the son of a patron go back to the table and take the tip when he was supposed to be going to the bathroom.
17.do not mumble or speak softly when ordering. restaurants are often loud. when i ask you to repeat your order, it is because i couldn't hear you or you spoke to quickly. trust me i just want to get your order right. do not get offended.
18.bringing your own food or beverage into a restaurant is rude. many places have signs posted about bringing outside food or beverage. just don't do it.
19. show your appreciation via speaking to manager or comment card in addition to tipping. many restaurants take these into consideration.
20.if you have a special order, remember your server will hear it from the kitchen. know that the server is going out of his or her way to get your order the way you want it and should be rewarded.
21. do not make assumptions about your server's intelligence or lack thereof. i have a college degree as do many of my coworkers. many servers are in school or are artists or mothers or just prefer the flexible hours. treat your server with respect in general. i once had an older woman overhear my conversation about the trouble my boyfriend and i were having with our water heater. she then proceeded to tell me that god hates people like me who live in sin. consequently, no one wants to wait on her now.
22. horror stories with food do happen. i have never spit in or done anything else foul to anyone's food or beverage. have i heard stories which i know to be true. of course. violating any of the previous rules is always the reasons why. remember your server will be handling your food and drinks and be interacting with those who are preparing them. these are not the people you want to mistreat.
23. tip with cash if possible. in some restaurants, servers do not get credit card tips til they get their paychecks which may be weeks. servers look for immediate money and generally depend on it. this isn't a must but is appreciated.
today's free stuff 2/4/09
free $20 exxon mobil card. You have to link a credit card to their speeedpass(free). New Speedpass customers in FL, LA, MA, NC, NJ, RI and SC will receive a $20 ExxonMobil Cash Card (or a $20 ExxonMobil Credit Card statement credit if Speedpass is linked to an ExxonMobil Credit Card) for activating a new Speedpass account. rebate is accrued after 90 days. https://www.speedpass.com/forms/frmDynPage.aspx?pPg=dina9.htm&pgType=N
free smashing pumpkins download http://download.hyundaigenesis.com/RegistrationPage.aspx?downloadfilename=billy.mp3
free stuff with bridal registry at kohl's ranges from butter warmer to $25 to flatware http://www.kohlscorporation.com/ecom/giftregistry/NewBridal/reasons_offers.htm
free smashing pumpkins download http://download.hyundaigenesis.com/RegistrationPage.aspx?downloadfilename=billy.mp3
free stuff with bridal registry at kohl's ranges from butter warmer to $25 to flatware http://www.kohlscorporation.com/ecom/giftregistry/NewBridal/reasons_offers.htm
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
denny's free breakfast effect on my day
i must admit i am a sucker for a freebie. who isn't? but, i do a lot of searching for freebies; and have a lot of experience in this area . so, imagine my glee when while watching the superbowl i saw denny's ads for free grand slam breakfasts on february 3rd. hello, free meal; but then i became concerned this might affect the money i make at my restaurant since i work at a restaurant known for breakfast food. my boyfriend and decided we would make a date of it though.
we headed out a couple hours before i needed to be at work just to be safe. the denny's we choose to go is on the same road as my work and there is also an ihop across the road from denny's. this road, rt 3, is a major byway here. as we came upon the denny's, we could see the line went out the door; but more problematic the cars were backed up waiting on rt 3 trying to get into the parking lot. i'm sure the snow brought at more people in addition to the free grand slam offer. after waiting a bit like the cars in front of us to even get into the parking lot, we gave up and headed to my restaurant to eat breakfast there. at least, we could get my discount and were assured excellent service. i also enjoyed my coworkers getting time to see my boyfriend who never comes to my work and interact with him. as well as being able to customize my breakfast to fit my needs as a vegetarian something made especially easy by knowing our menu inside and out. i should have noticed other cars doing the same as us.
my restaurant was yet to see the "denny's effect". after i began working and more people became discouraged waiting, they too headed to my restaurant. unlike me, these people were generally grumpy before they even walked into our door. many had waited in line and were cold. many annoyed to have to pay for a meal when they had expected a free one. we had been slow and expected to be especially slow figuring people would go to denny's instead of us. we got slammed. people were rude before we even greeted them. around lunch time the entire restaurant filled and we had a wait for people to be seated. in contrast, the previous day we had less than 3 tables in the entire restaurant with a capacity of 39 tables. nothing could be fast enough or good enough for many of the customers. we had 2 tables walk out. one was mine upset that their meal took too long to make. one man began yelling. as a server, this was a nightmare. when there are this many customers all at once, it is impossible for me to give my tables the quality of service i normally would. and, since the service level is lower, my tips are lower. i even got stiffed by one table. i was exhausted and hadn't made very much money at all. this is worse case scenario as a server.
we headed out a couple hours before i needed to be at work just to be safe. the denny's we choose to go is on the same road as my work and there is also an ihop across the road from denny's. this road, rt 3, is a major byway here. as we came upon the denny's, we could see the line went out the door; but more problematic the cars were backed up waiting on rt 3 trying to get into the parking lot. i'm sure the snow brought at more people in addition to the free grand slam offer. after waiting a bit like the cars in front of us to even get into the parking lot, we gave up and headed to my restaurant to eat breakfast there. at least, we could get my discount and were assured excellent service. i also enjoyed my coworkers getting time to see my boyfriend who never comes to my work and interact with him. as well as being able to customize my breakfast to fit my needs as a vegetarian something made especially easy by knowing our menu inside and out. i should have noticed other cars doing the same as us.
my restaurant was yet to see the "denny's effect". after i began working and more people became discouraged waiting, they too headed to my restaurant. unlike me, these people were generally grumpy before they even walked into our door. many had waited in line and were cold. many annoyed to have to pay for a meal when they had expected a free one. we had been slow and expected to be especially slow figuring people would go to denny's instead of us. we got slammed. people were rude before we even greeted them. around lunch time the entire restaurant filled and we had a wait for people to be seated. in contrast, the previous day we had less than 3 tables in the entire restaurant with a capacity of 39 tables. nothing could be fast enough or good enough for many of the customers. we had 2 tables walk out. one was mine upset that their meal took too long to make. one man began yelling. as a server, this was a nightmare. when there are this many customers all at once, it is impossible for me to give my tables the quality of service i normally would. and, since the service level is lower, my tips are lower. i even got stiffed by one table. i was exhausted and hadn't made very much money at all. this is worse case scenario as a server.
today's free stuff 2/3/09
free glade plugins scented oil, hawaiian breeze refill, and coupon http://www.rightathome.com/offers/200902-GiftPack/
free subscription to road and track magazine http://www.mercurymagazines.com/pr1/121/121158
free speed lip gloss for females age 13-29 http://www.seventeen.com/sweepstakes/6337
free napoleon perdis lip gloss http://www.napoleonperdis.com/subscribe.cfm
free stuff from great american country by earning points. right now, they everything from keychains to blueray players. you earn points by doing surveys or trivia. http://superfan.gactv.com/main.aspx
free subscription to road and track magazine http://www.mercurymagazines.com/pr1/121/121158
free speed lip gloss for females age 13-29 http://www.seventeen.com/sweepstakes/6337
free napoleon perdis lip gloss http://www.napoleonperdis.com/subscribe.cfm
free stuff from great american country by earning points. right now, they everything from keychains to blueray players. you earn points by doing surveys or trivia. http://superfan.gactv.com/main.aspx
Monday, February 2, 2009
6 more weeks of winter
punxsutawney phil saw his shadow so per folkloric beliefs we are bound for 6 more weeks of winter. of course, from a literal standpoint we are bound for 6 more weeks of winter considering spring will begin then. if you had asked me a little over a week ago, i would have said i was saddened by the thought of more winter especially contemplating it with how unvirginialike this cold has been. now that we've had a bit of snow and the forecasters are calling for the possibility of more tomorrow, all i can think is bring on more of the white stuff.
my shoe collection part 7
more from the target portion of my collection purchased online for $7.49. they are black and white print d'orsay flats from issac mizrahi for target. my shoe collection part 6
pearlescent pink crinkle patent flats with cutout detail by mossimo for target purchased last august for $4.99
my shoe collection part 5
i purchased these red and black faux snake skin peep toe pumps by delicious last october at rugged wearhouse for $6.99. red is one of my two favorite colors.
a view into my shoe collection part 4
a view into my shoe collection part 3
last fall, i added these two tone beige and black bottle heeled vesters by mossimo for target to my shoe collection. i loved the capped toe. as you may notice throughout my shoe collection, i am a fan of some sort of detail at the toe whether it be a peep toe, or capped toe, or just bows, etc. i also enjoy the contrast of the black patent and the matte beige. i bought them in the store when they had been reduced to 75% off to $5.74. they were the first pair of shoes i bought with a strap across the ankle a feature which i now find to be a nice addition in terms of ease of walking if you have a tendency to walk out of your shoes a problem i occasionally have as my feet are two different sizes. fashion experts clinton kelly and stacy london often rail against straps across the ankle for women as they cut the line of the leg. but, i find worn with pants the strap is covered; and you still stay in your shoes. i wore these shoes to a funeral as i couldn't bring myself to wear completely head to toe black, and received many complements. target.com still has the vester available both in the two tone and all black though only at 50% off currently. you can check them out or buy them at http://www.target.com/Mossimo-Vester-Mary-Jane-Pumps/dp/B0018BIRIW/187-7891649-6828843?ie=UTF8&node=10756831&frombrowse=1&rh=tgt%5F1%3APumps&page=1
today's free stuff 2/2/09
free growth chart from playskool http://www.cafemom.com/sponsor/playskool/index.php
free video rental at redbox with code d9p24g. for locations, check http://www.redbox.com/ as they have locations at many grocery stores, macdonald's, and walmarts nationwide. if you signup online at their website, they will text you the free text codes every monday, many holidays, and lots of other occasions. i find getting these codes via text is quite convenient so that i have it at the ready when i need to punch it into their machine.
free martina mcbride's i love you download at walmart.com good thru 2/4/09 http://soundcheck.walmart.com/martina-mcbride
free video rental at redbox with code d9p24g. for locations, check http://www.redbox.com/ as they have locations at many grocery stores, macdonald's, and walmarts nationwide. if you signup online at their website, they will text you the free text codes every monday, many holidays, and lots of other occasions. i find getting these codes via text is quite convenient so that i have it at the ready when i need to punch it into their machine.
free martina mcbride's i love you download at walmart.com good thru 2/4/09 http://soundcheck.walmart.com/martina-mcbride
a view into my shoe collection part 2
i got these camel rounded toe faux snake skin stillettos by hypnotic at rugged wearhouse for $6.99. have i mentioned how much i love rugged wearhouse for scoring a deal on shoes. they reminded me of a faux peacock headband i had back in the 7th grade and absolutely adored. plus, i thought the heel looked rather unique being straight down from the heel. i think these work well both for work and a night on the town.
a view into my shoe collection
as promised, i am now featuring some of my favorite shoes from my personal collection. i picked up these charcoal grey and black mixed texture stillettos from miss me at my local rugged wearhouse for $6.99. i loved the cutouts at both the ankles and toes.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
and no one thought this year's superbowl would be a squeaker
i must admit like many people i thought this superbowl was set up to be lopsided. i too thought the steelers were a shoe in to win this superbowl up against the cardinals a team that has never before even been in the superbowl. the cardinals who have the 4th worst win record all time for the nfl, and even this year making it to the superbowl they posted a less than stellar record having the 2nd worst record of any of the teams who made into the playoffs. considering this, the game seemed to be going as expected til the 4th quarter. i truly was getting a bit bored with being at home not a party and not having a team to root for. but, what a finish. i think it was the most exciting superbowl finish i have seen as the tone seems to be set that point with one time clearly in the lead and holding on to it. for once, i enjoyed watching the superbowl if only for the 4th quarter.
the boss makes me realize once again that i'm getting old
i may have been born in '77, but i am a child of the 80s. and to me, the boss (bruce springsteen to you youngsters) is the bob dylan of the 80s. and, that's saying a lot since i think bob dylan is probably one of the greatest living lyricists and unlike many i like his singing though more during his early work than now where it i will admit has become borderline difficult to understand. glory days was a song about the life i imagined growing up in a semi small town i would have. so, when i heard that the boss would be playing the halftime show of the superbowl instead of some new pop star i would have barely heard of i was psyched.
we were unsurprisingly slow at work this morning as a result of both the upcoming game and the economy. so, the upcoming game was topic of many conversations. at our restaurant, employees range in age from 16-78. yes, 78. but, the younger 16-20 something are an increasing part of our population. much to my dismay, many of my coworkers were not only not thrilled about a walk down memory lane, but confused as to who bruce springsteen even was. as if this wasn't enough of a shot in the gut, my own boyfriend was booing the boss during the halftime show complaining he was a halftime show talking about how the boss was no longer relevant when he was a kid. yet another reminder of the difference that only a few years in age can make in our memories since my boyfriend is 5 years younger than me.
we were unsurprisingly slow at work this morning as a result of both the upcoming game and the economy. so, the upcoming game was topic of many conversations. at our restaurant, employees range in age from 16-78. yes, 78. but, the younger 16-20 something are an increasing part of our population. much to my dismay, many of my coworkers were not only not thrilled about a walk down memory lane, but confused as to who bruce springsteen even was. as if this wasn't enough of a shot in the gut, my own boyfriend was booing the boss during the halftime show complaining he was a halftime show talking about how the boss was no longer relevant when he was a kid. yet another reminder of the difference that only a few years in age can make in our memories since my boyfriend is 5 years younger than me.
the most painful superbowl commercials of all time
i do not normally watch commercials anymore. its part of the beauty of having a dvr. i fast forward through commercials and avoid them at all cost. but, its the superbowl. tonight's commercials during the superbowl will be all the talk tomorrow. so, i broke down and watched the commercials. now i want to know who's brillant idea was it to have 3-d ads during the superbowl? and, at the beginning of the halftime of all times to air them; i mean really. now, i have a headache and am a bit nauseated after the torture of watching the commercials for albeit a movie i may want to watch (what can i say even as an adult i like animated movies.). now maybe i am part of a minority who suffered after watching these commercials since i have a weak stomach that is easily upset. i almost had to leave the theater watching cloverfield due to the shifty camerawork. but, i doubt i am the only one. my boyfriend who has an iron stomach complained of a headache almost immediately watching the ads. the superbowl is a time for parties, and the halftime is when many people eat to avoid missing any of the game. this is america home of the greasy meal and superbowl parties are rarely an exception to that rule. wings, nachos, pizza are all popular party options. in fact, we are having pizza at our house. in my mind, the advertizers for monsters vs. aliens really did everyone a disservice and ruined my whole superbowl experience.
my newest shoe aquisition through ebay
these are my latest ebay aquisition. i received them in the mail on thursday. they are issac mizrahi i believe from a previous season for target though i never saw them. they have a patent tortoise print which i am not sure shows up so well in the pic. i got them for $7.74 including shipping which is more than i was hoping to spend on ebay for non designer shoes, but i think they are super cute and versatile. they were new never worn as they still had tags on when i received them.
today's free stuff 2/1/09
not a lot today with it being superbowl sunday, but i did find a few freebies.
free clean and clear dissolving wipes text "clean" to 467467
free sunkist lemonade stand http://www.sunkist.com/takeastand/request.asp
free 7 day pass to universal parks to 1st 100,000 after airing of tonight's episode of heros http://www.universalheroes.com/register.jsp
free clean and clear dissolving wipes text "clean" to 467467
free sunkist lemonade stand http://www.sunkist.com/takeastand/request.asp
free 7 day pass to universal parks to 1st 100,000 after airing of tonight's episode of heros http://www.universalheroes.com/register.jsp
a pat on my back
i wait til the last minute to do everything. i know what time everything closes, cause i am likely to hit the stores right before they do. i can't begin to tell you how many times i have slipped in to return videos minutes before closing time. i do my makeup in the car in the parking lot of my work minutes before i have to clock in. i always wait til april 15th without fail to do my taxes and then have to wait forever with the rest of the procrastinators for my refund. last year, i efiled at 11:35pm april 15th. i have no good reasons for procrastination. its just my m.o. well, for once, i didn't procrasinate. i got my w-2 this afternoon and efiled tonight. perhaps, i do have the incentive of needing the money as soon as possible thanks to our crappy economy. but, i must say i am a bit self satisfied that i have already sent off my taxes and will hopefully be receiving my tax refund directly deposited into my checking account within the next 2 weeks. so, kudos to me.
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